I would be honored to support your healing change. Search Questions or Ask New:. Top Rated Answers Anonymous July 1st, pm. Forgive, but don't forget. Don't hold on to the negative things that happened between y'all in the past. Instead, remember the good and blissful how to talk to an ex that you once shared. The only thing holding onto negative feelings will do to you is keep you from enjoying your next relationship.
If the break up wasn't messy, then a talk is surely the right way to go for the closure you need. If it wasn't pretty, still forgive even if it wasn't their fault. You need to be at peace; not only in your mind, but your heart as well. You can do it, but patience will be the key factor.
Is it ok to talk to your ex?
Did you find this post helpful? Have you tried asking him? If yes and he is not cooperative then you will just have to seek closure by knowing that whatever it is you are not part of it anymore and you can move on. Anonymous May 24th, pm.
What I have learned about getting closure from an ex is this You can not rely on the other person to provide that closure for you. Forgive yourself and don't be hard on yourself. The closure will not fix what you are feeling. The best thing to do is forgive yourself and use that as your closure.
It will get better. In my own experience with exes, knowing what the both of you feels about the situation through talking it out like civilized people is the most efficient way to get closure. I know it's scary but, if both parties know the sides and opinions of each other, it will lead to understanding and eventually, closure. Sometimes, looking for closure could end up hurting you and your former partner even more than the breakup did, And really whether closure is the right the right thing for you is dependent on how the relationship was ended.
Finding closure also shouldn't happen right away after a break up. It takes time to settle all the depression and pain that came with the breakup.
The cause of most breakups
A clear and open mind is needed to properly handle closure so further damage is prevented. Mutual breakups tend to be easier to receive closure than ones that end on really bad terms. I have been in your place before and I can say closure is a good choice after a breakup I suggest that you sit down and talk to your ex and settle any problems. I am not sure if its closure but I have certainly moved forwardI had to keep in mind all the bad times instead of the goodalso talked threw the break up with a councillor, it took a while and it was painfull but the more I talked the less painfull it was ,the other important thing is to find something that I liked doin to take my mind of her all the time ,Today I hardly think about it and if I do its not for very longI have acknowledged that we spent part of our lifes together and have some fond memories but that was only part of my life not it all ,and am quite ok being alone as it gives me a chance of meeting the right person for me.
The first step is you. Do you even want to move on? Or do you want to stay stuck in the moment, hoping he'll come back? Once you find your determination to move on, it's easier from there onwards. Just talk to them; it's easier said than done, but it is the most important component of a relationship-even if it is to end it.
Talking to your partner can help set expectations, and clarify any past actions or words from either party. Text them, let them know that it's over, but you need closure, and talk about whatever is on your mind.
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Don't be shy, or hesitant when it comes to this; if they talk, you'll be at peace, and if they don't, you know what the relationship means to them, and they're not worth your time, and you're still at peace. It's a win-win!
Hope this helps :. Depending on the situation, if an ex continues to contact you, either hear them out or ignore them. If they ex broke up with you because they decided how to talk to an ex pursue another relationship, I would suggest not picking up the phone. Chances are they are only talking to you because they are no longer happy with the relationship they left you for. If you broke up on mutual feelings and nothing has negatively escalated in your relationship, then I say hear them out.
But it all depends on your understanding of the relationship. Allow yourself to feel each and every emotion, if you want to cry then cry, scream or laugh then do so. If you stop yourself your only postponing the emotion otherwise and not stopping it. Once you've cried as hard as you can and truly felt the emotion the next time you revisit that emotion it will become easier and quicker to move forward each and every time you go there.
Anonymous August 24th, pm. Find some reasons to talk to him, then invite him for a drink. Talk to him nicely and show your kindness, your changes and so on.
Confrontation is a good process to get closure, when you face the person you once loved and loved you back and see everything's different it can immediately make you realise that nothing is the same way and accept that you have to move on.
If you're ex chose to burn bridges then you will have to find it yourself, it might be harder, writing will help a lot, going back on what you wrote 3 days before, or 2 weeks before, will make you realise that this your past relationship, the breakup does not have such an important place in your thoughts. Look forward.
Should you talk to your ex?
That's the best thing you can do. Look to other people for the comfort your ex once gave you. You don't necessarily have to forgive your ex, just make sure you're not hateful. Anonymous July 24th, pm. If you need closure, you need to firstly figure out what answer you are looking for and secondly what you will do when you get the closure you need.
Anonymous August 14th, pm. Focus on you, do your own thing and most of all learn to find and love yourself again. Another important thing, is to block your ex from all your social media s as well to help gain even more closure. I'm guessing your partner left you hanging which is why you feel stuck about closure. At any rate, assessing whether the breakup happened for the best or not would give you a sense of closure because I'm sure there must have been plenty of reasons leading up to the breakup.
All you got to do is ask yourself whether the positives outweigh the negatives as far as your relationship ending is concerned. If you haven't received closure by now since the time you guys have broken up, chances are you're looking for something you're truly never going to get. It'll be hard but you need to cut all ties from the person and focus on yourself. Keep yourself as occupied as possible and away from them.
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Time will heal you. Anonymous August 2nd, am. Sit down and have a talk, just go through memories you once shared and have a good laugh about them. Breakups shouldn't be sad and heartbreaking, you take them and make them into something better which later you'll be happy you did. Once we know someone and hopelessly fall for that person, we can never go back to that not-knowing state.
The person becomes a part of who you are. But we do move on with our lives and it always takes its due time. Try to distract yourself by indulging into different activities and meet new people, specially.
Why is communication between exes so important?
Those excruciating memories fade when someone new completely takes over your mind. Find that person. Sometimes it can get really hard to get closure from an ex, especially since most times you are not still in communication with them. The best way to get how to talk to an ex, is to find it within yourself.